of course like any social tip this doesn’t always work but here’s something i’ve found useful when requesting accommodations: present it as a simple fact. like, i am explaining to you how this is going to go.
that way, if they do have objections or need to negotiate something, they can let you know, but they are less likely to just reflexively raise obstacles than if you frame it as a request.
eg someone replies to your email saying they’ll call you but you can’t talk on the phone. you could say, “i am not able to make phone calls for disability reasons. could we continue this discussion via email please?”
but i have found that if you ask, often they will say no and try to insist you do the thing you just said you can’t.
so what i do instead is something like “i am not able to make phone calls for disability reasons but i would be happy to answer further questions via email.”
there is nothing in this statement for them to say no to. you haven’t asked permission, you have simply told them how communicating with you works. and in my experience, often people will just roll with it.
This works even with hardliner types and for things like trying to take some desperately needed time off
“I will not be able to work on these dates due to the fact that I will not be in town” is how I started to frame my time off requests when I worked in the service industry and man did it smooth out a lot of things that would have been fights otherwise